There is a framed cartoon in my office which shows two men sitting in a jail cell talking. The caption reads, “Those surprise witnesses didn’t surprise me, but they really surprised my lawyer!”

When you engage with a divorce lawyer you need to make sure you tell him or her everything that could potentially affect your case. It’s not the time to hide any information, regardless of how unimportant you might think it is, or how embarrassing. In fact, those embarrassing things you might not want to discuss may well be the most important issues for your lawyer to know. This is true for any type of legal case, i.e. criminal or personal injury, but is particularly critical in divorce cases.

Your lawyer is a lot like a coach…He or she develops both the offensive and defensive strategy for your trial. On offense, your lawyer needs all the documents and information that supports your position.

Typically, people have no difficulty finding all the material that supports the offense. It’s the defense that sometimes creates problems.

Imagine if your “coach” had your opponent’s playbook—it would make for great preparation for your defense! By providing your lawyer with all information that could possibly work to your disadvantage, such as embarrassing financial or personal decisions, you are effectively giving your lawyer your opponent’s playbook. With all the offensive and defensive information, your lawyer can assess what will impact your case and make strategic decisions accordingly.

So what if your pride is too great and you fail to disclose some embarrassing piece of information? In all likelihood, opposing counsel will introduce it during the trial or settlement process. Now, your lawyer is ill-prepared to handle the topic. If you disclosed the information prior to going to court, your lawyer would be prepared with rebuttal information and a strategy related to introducing, or not introducing, that information during the trial.

The outcome of the case may well depend on the trial strategy employed to deal with those embarrassing issues. Don’t hurt your chances by making your lawyer the victim of a “surprise witness or document.”